the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
