The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I just want to make out with him forever
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
