I don't usually arrange sex via text message
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
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