What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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