actually, I'm a sock model
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize