Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
