if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Maybe he injected his testicle?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
