watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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