and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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