That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
How does it feel to date your dad?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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