Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
