is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Randomize
