i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
