people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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