new low.... made out with someone while peeing
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
