We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize