found the other keg... it's in the tree
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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