this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
