Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize