R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Tell her she can't have a vagina
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
