Swine flu. Run for my life!
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
People in love make me want to vomit
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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