There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Randomize