I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
