i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Randomize
