My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
