if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
