return my video game
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Randomize
