i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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