He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
