D3 body, D1 cock
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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