he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
