The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
