According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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