if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
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