"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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