My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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