i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
