GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Randomize
