I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
