i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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