I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
