yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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