Christians are straight up FREAKS
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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