if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
