in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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