I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Randomize
