Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
you traded sex for a burrito?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
