So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
