Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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