I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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