Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
